Wow — it’s a while since I last posted and we are now into 2021. Things have been very anxiety provoking over the last couple of months with Christmas in the middle. The pandemic continues to ravage through our lives and the onset of winter and the new variant has made the spread so much worse.
My oldest baby didn’t make it home for Christmas due to the pandemic restrictions, so it was a strange celebration. We are getting used to that now. Everything in the last 10 months has been a bit more muted than normal. My middle and youngest babies both made it home for Christmas and to see in 2021. I can’t remember when we last spent new year’s eve with my son so that was an unexpected bonus. Not sure he saw it that way! We are not sure when they will both return to their university and college due to the new lock down so my nest will be two thirds full for a while. I will make sure that I enjoy the time spent with them both.
This whole year had taught me that you never know what is around the corner and to make the most of every minute.
I have had two weeks off work which has been lovely but I am looking forward to getting back into a bit of a routine again and to have some focus to my day. My days are late starting at the moment with very little productivity. I have increased my working hours from Monday. The decision was taken before I knew I would have two of my children at home in January and February and maybe into Spring. I hope can juggle everything. Working from home definitely has its advantages ….makeup and smart clothes not required, I can even work in my pyjamas if I so wish, and lunch can be spent with love ones. The disadvantages are that it is very hard to switch off from pressing deadlines, and close the office door. Your work mobile may also have the tendency to ring outside your working hours as people forget that you don’t work 24 hours a day…7 days a week!
My anxiety has been really bad over the last few weeks and I have now decided not to watch the news on the TV or listen to it on the radio. The coverage of the pandemic is so scary and I only feel comfortable staying in my own little bubble and keeping my babies safe. I am so anxious now that a trip to the opticians yesterday made for a few hours of broken sleep last night. I hope I don’t have to go into town at all over the next few weeks. The mind is a powerful thing and I hate the feeling of being out of control and full of fear. The easiest way to keep calm is to just exist within my four walls and concentrate on that. Keeping warm and fed and anxiety free.
Today I did some painting. I haven’t picked up a paint brush in many years but I really enjoyed it. It was really therapeutic and very calming. My daughter and I made some plaster fridge magnets and then painted them with acrylic paints while listening to some loud music …singing along with great gusto. They look really good and our mood was really lifted. A wonderful de-stress session. I will definitely be picking the brushes up again soon — I haven’t even tidied them off the dining room table…. in anticipation of maybe doing a little more tomorrow. A wonderful new hobby when it is so cold and scary out in the wider world. I am still doing Sudoku and 1000 piece puzzles to keep me busy, and I am trying to read more. All good for the mind and soul.
Over the last two months I have not moved as much as I would off liked and have eaten maybe more than I should. as perhaps most people do over the festive period. I didn’t reach my target of 8 miles on the bike by Christmas…I’m still only doing 5, and sometimes just 3, and not as regularly as I would like. But back to work on Monday and back to focus on doing a bit more self-care.
Roll on week 19 — another week closer to the end of this pandemic we hope ….. I never expected my empty nest adventure to be quite like this ……
